three and a half

When I had my first baby my goal was to nurse for six months, then 9 months, then 12 months. Then I met a mom who told me I could let my baby continue to breastfeed after age one, that was new information to me because I thought breastfeeding was like bottle feeding and only went to one year. I worked in a lot of daycare centers before I became a mom and at one year they got a cup instead of a bottle. At the time, being just 22 years old, I didn't know breastfeeding past one year was an option. I was young and inexperienced. My first child went on to nurse for four years. I weaned her when she turned four because I heard a story on the radio of a mother who had her child taken away when he was six because he was still breastfeeding. It scared me. That was 2001. My second child I weaned when she was two years and one month old because I found out I was pregnant with her sister. I know some women do nurse through pregnancy, but I miscarried while breastfeeding my first child so I wasn't willing to risk it. My third child is my only self-weaner. She started sucking her fingers when she was one month old, so she was not much of a comfort nurser. She weaned herself when she was 2 years and 7 months old. My fourth child, my last child, my open-heart surgery survivor, is still nursing. He will be three and seven months tomorrow. Some days he will only nurse before bed, most days he nurses in the morning and before bed, some days he will nurse a few times during the day. His norm is that he can breastfeed if he wants to and it seems to me, logically, that is the norm for mammals. For me it's nice because I get to cuddle him and I get some quiet time. It also makes bedtime a piece of cake, nursing a preschooler is like a magic fix for sickness, hurts, falls, sadness, anything, any trouble he has will be fixed easily with just a few minutes of nursing. He will be my second self-weaner.

peaceful

I know, looking at this picture the word peaceful isn't exactly what comes to mind, but day-to-day life in our home, even with four kids IS peaceful. My thought about each of my children is they are their own person and I am the person lucky enough to know them, lucky enough to guide them, lucky enough to love them. The most beautiful part is they get to love each other too. My son is the only boy in a family with three big sisters, the big sister in the picture is the younger me, her patience with children, her innate knowledge of knowing how to react and what to say, she is magical, she is better than me I think. She is the defender of everyone smaller, younger, weaker, and everyone bigger, older, stronger. Here, in this photo, he was looking in her mouth and not opening her mouth very gently, yet she was gentle with him, she was laughing, and that made him laugh too. He likes to open my mouth then open his mouth and make noise into mine, with his sister he was just putting his hand in there. Invasion of space? Oh, sure, absolutely, and if she asked him to stop and he did not I would have swooped in, scooped him up, and distracted him, but she was laughing so I took pictures. I try not to spend my days admonishing my children for one thing after the other, and I have been doing it for so long that I hardly stop them from anything because they hardly do anything I don't like. My son is different as he is after all, three and a half, but even with him I will say one time to stop doing whatever I want him to stop doing, then I will just pick him up laughing and distract and redirect. So, it's a peaceful house. I wish I was as patient with my husband as I am with my kids, but I am working on that!

Breastfeeding for Your Heart

http://tedmed.com/talks/show?id=292925